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Writer's pictureCaroline

What To Listen To When You’re Feeling Like the Other Guy in a Romance Movie

This one goes out to all my John Ambrose McClarens and Marco Valentin Peñas. All the guys and gals who are the “other” ones, the members of the love triangle who don’t get picked, the obviously better options that don’t end up with a happy ending. I envision this playlist as what you listen to when you’re trying so hard to get over someone. You’ve kind of given up faith on love because you had the perfect person right there for a short moment, but then they leave you for their “first love”. You’ve treated them so right, but they go back to the person who treated them wrong. This is for all of the people who deserve better.


“Fix It To Break It” by Clinton Kane

What I would give for Clinton Kane to serenade me on a canal in Amsterdam. This man has got serious talent. “Fix It To Break It” is about a failing relationship and whether you should reconcile just to fall apart again. In his song, Clinton is the one putting the effort into a relationship where the other person doesn’t do the same, and he clearly deserves someone who can love him the same as he loves them.


“illicit affairs” by Taylor Swift

This song is and has been one of my favorite songs from folklore. There definitely aren’t any illicit affairs in teen rom-coms, but there is that whole, uh, kissing other people thing. I guess what I meant by putting this song on the playlist was about how in this whole “affair” situation, heartbreak is going to happen and the person being disloyal will end up going back to the person they were originally with. It’s like how Lara Jean broke up with Peter, kissed John, and then got back with Peter, leaving John heartbroken. I love you Lara Jean, but not cool dude.


“We Lied To Each Other” by Olivia O’Brien

I think this song is definitely the most angry out of all of the songs on this list, and it’s about two people distancing themselves in a relationship. One of the lyrics is “I lied when I said I don’t care, and you lied when you told me you did”. The first part is saying how you let the other person affect you way more than you let on, and the second part is about how that person says that they care about you when they really don’t. I literally picture every single song in the context of To All the Boys 2, but I envision this song as John Ambrose telling Lara Jean it’s okay that she wants to be with Peter, but he’s secretly angry about how she led him on, and he’s questioning whether she really does care about him if she just went and hurt him like that.


“Rush” by Lewis Capaldi feat. Jessie Reyez

Man, is this song sad. It has this two-sided take on a breakup that I feel is very relatable (not like I would know though because I’ve never had my heart broken). It comes at a point where you’re feeling so terrible, and one one hand, you hope your ex feels just as terrible as you do. On the other hand, you still care for them, so you hope that they’re not experiencing the same loss as you are because you don’t want them to be so hurt. To me, it’s the epitome of being the “good guy” and wanting everyone to be okay even if it’s at your sacrifice, but sometimes you’re just tired of it and want someone else to hurt along with you.


“broken hearts club” by gnash

This song comes at a point after a breakup where you just want to numb the pain. gnash introduces a group called the broken hearts club, full of people who’ve been hurt just like him and who can sympathize with him, take his pain away, and make him feel a little less lonely.


Cherry blossom break before we get into the several "I'd treat you better" songs


“good guys” by LANY

There’s always been this contrast between the bad boy and the good guy: the bad boy is the mysterious one that you want to be with just to prove you can, and the good guy is the one that’ll treat you right but will never get your time of day. There’s just this thing where girls want to go for those bad boys even though the good guy is the better choice. Why? I couldn’t tell you. In this song, there’s this back and forth between what someone does and what they want to do. They want to be chivalrous and bring you flowers and slow dance with you, but instead they act cool and more like the bad boy. It’s pointed out in the song that the good guys never win and you could put so much effort into someone else only for the feelings to be reciprocated, and that’s real sad. John Ambrose, I want you to bring me flowers, don’t worry.


“i hate u, i love u” by Olivia O’Brien and gnash

Who would I be if I didn’t put this song on this playlist? This song is a compilation of all of those love-hate relationship feelings: you’re still in love with someone you really shouldn’t be, and you don’t want to have those feelings. Another big part of this song is the line “you want her, you need her, and I’ll never be her”, which definitely resonates in the whole “other guy” sense. You want to be the person they’re with because that means that you’ll be with them.


“Instead” by Ryan Amador

This song just says everything and more. It’s written from the point of view of a guy addressing the person he’s in love with, who’s being treated poorly by another guy but chose that guy instead of him. He’s trying to tell this person that he could treat her so much better and this other guy isn’t good enough for her. Again, this is kind of the good guy vs bad boy thing, and the bad boy gets the girl yet again, even though he doesn’t deserve her.


“Heather” by Conan Gray

I’m absolutely in love with this song, and it’s definitely so relatable because as Conan says, “I think everyone has a Heather in their life”. Heather is the person who your crush is in love with. She’s the sweetest girl imaginable, but you hate her. You really hate her because your crush loves Heather and not you. You hate her but you also want to be her. Even if we don’t want to admit it, we all have feelings like that for someone at some point. They don’t deserve to be disliked in any way, but you direct all of your hate toward them because you’re jealous. We all wish we were Heather.


“Idk Love” by Jeremy Zucker

This is the song to listen to when you’ve just given up on love and sworn to be single. Jeremy just got his heart broken so bad that he forgot what love was, and it feels almost like he’s trying to convince himself that he’s going to be better off alone and he’s trying to accept the deviation of his life from what it used to be.


“i’m so tired...” by Lauv and Troye Sivan

I was going back and forth between which Lauv song to include in this playlist, but I settled on “i’m so tired…”, which is more of an upbeat song with a meaning I find similar to “Idk Love”. This song is just a complaint about love songs and love in general because so many songs these days are about love, and it’s so easy to write a song about it since there’s a bunch of different sides and situations. However, when you’re trying to get over someone, this overload of love songs is just a constant reminder of what you can’t have.


A pic from Taiwan before we FINALLY start getting over them


“I Swear I’m Over You” by Dave Days and Freesia

This song is what you say to yourself when you’re trying to convince yourself that you’re over someone, but the lyrics are written in a way in which it’s so obvious that you haven’t moved on yet. Saying “I swear I never think about you all the time” isn’t too convincing, right? I feel like when you’re trying to move forward a lot of it has to do with you trying to convince yourself and knowing that moving forward is the only thing you can do. I would like to note, though, that listening to this song does not help you get over anyone. Just helps you wallow.


“Sorry For Writing All The Songs About You” by Clara Mae

This is, um, something I would send to someone. Sorry for writing all the songs about you. Didn’t mean to, but if you see the previous song, it’s just so easy. This song really resonates with me, and it’s the story of how someone writes all of these songs about their ex while getting over a breakup and to kind of process the whole thing. That other person won’t be too happy with all of these moments put on paper, but it’s a way of processing similar to journaling or simply ranting. You can say all of these things that you can’t say in person, and at the end of the day, no one may know if it’s true or not.


“Anaheim” by Nicole Zefanya

This song to me envisions a relationship that could’ve been, and how you would’ve given everything for them, but you’re not going to end up together. It’s calm and acoustic and got that slight tinge of a bittersweet emotion. It’s like how you want so badly to be with someone, but it won’t happen.


“Chinese Restaurant” by Scott Helman

I put this song on here not because of its exact meaning, but rather, because of the overall emotions and thoughts in it. Essentially, Scott is describing how he fell in love at first sight with someone (at a Chinese restaurant) and never saw them again, but dreamt of their future together. It’s all of these hypothetical situations and what ifs that make this song similar to “the 1” by Taylor Swift. You don’t end up with this person, but what would’ve happened if you did?


“the 1” by Taylor Swift

Speaking of “the 1”, I just had to include another song from folklore because the album is magic. “the 1” has that nostalgic feeling about the what ifs, like how if your ex was the one (aka your true love or the person you end up with). This song I envision someone listening to after the breakup, but at a point where they can reminisce on it and not be too sad. They would think something like, “It would’ve been cool if we ended up together, but it’s okay and we’ve both moved on.” Because the song says “it would’ve been fun” and not “it would’ve been my deepest desires come to life”.


“I Don’t Wanna Love You Anymore” by LANY

This song channels getting over a person and realizing that you don’t want to be with them any more. I feel like this song would be your hype song when you accept that you’re not going to get back together with that person and all you want to do is move on.


“Kissing Other People” by Lennon Stella

Lennon Stella has done it again, folks. I would listen to this song after I’ve finally gotten over someone, and I know that I’ve gotten over them because I don’t feel guilty kissing other people. You get to this place where you can move on and not feel sorry about it.


Well, thanks for wallowing in your sadness with me! This was really fun to make, and I wish I could make an actual playlist and link it, but I’m not trying to give away my personal info. I wanted to put this playlist together as an evolution: starting off with the hurt and anger at yourself and others, then getting over it to the point of slightly sad reminiscing, and finally moving on. Hope you all enjoyed, and thanks for getting in your feels with me :’).


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